Set Me Free
by NarcissisticInfidelity
Summary: SPOILER: This is a oneshot, based on when Severus Snape dies, and what awaits him afterwards.


He could remember the snake sinking its fangs into his skin, and the blood streaming endlessly down his body. He didn't know that a human could hold so much blood, but alas, he was eventually drained dry of it. The last thing he could truly remember was the pair of eyes that had haunted him for sixteen years; eyes that swam in and out of his dreams, and terrorized him in nightmares. They were a vibrant shade of green, and though the green eventually faded to black, that was all he needed to see before he let it all go.

Lily Evans was at least there, in the end.

Severus Snape stirred slightly, feeling a surface beneath him. He was well aware that seconds ago, he had been bleeding to death in the Shrieking Shack, attempting to staunch a wound from killing him and trying desperately to hold on before inevitably meeting his untimely death.

His skin was bare, and he noticed this odd fact the second he had opened his eyes. He felt extremely vulnerable, thinking back to a time that was too far away to really remember. Two peers by the names of James Potter, and Sirius Black, dangling him upside down in front of other classmates…

His usual sneer curled at his lips, but the fact that he was currently naked in an unknown destination made him feel uneasy, and cautiously, he looked around, slowly sitting up.

A pair of robes were levitating in front of him, the Slytherin crest emblazoned upon the left breast of the fabric. He hesitated, but they were hanging there lifelessly, and he was in desperate need of clothes. Swiftly he grabbed the floating object, and when nothing happened, he threw it on, thankful for whomever had conjured the attire.

The surface he was sitting upon was white. It was much like a giant mist, and when he touched it, it didn't feel solid, but he couldn't go through it, either. He wished he had his wand on him.

At once, a slender stick of wood emerged in front of him, but it seemed too easy. He had been deceived too many times before, and noticing a wand being produced right under his mental command seemed a little too unnerving.

Absentmindedly, his fingers stroked his neck, where seconds before there were two large bite marks and a steady flow of blood. But now, there was nothing. His black orbs widened in surprise, and more desperately, he used his other hand, as if somehow he would find the wound. Again, there was nothing but soft, clean skin.

What was this?

Throwing down his arms in irritation, his sleeve fluttered and he noticed that his left arm was oddly pale, and soft. No blemishes touched the skin – but more astonishingly, no Dark Mark. In amazement he hauled his arm up, gazing at it closely. True; his skin was bare, and he realized his entire body had an almost pearly glow to it.

An innocent glow.

The wand still hovered before him, waiting to be taken. He watched it closely, apprehensively, and almost on cue it floated closer to him, silently coaxing him. With a sharp intake of breath, he snatched the item from the air, and felt the warmth and comfort it elicited at once. The wand accepted him, just as his old one had.

Stowing the item away, he stood, his limbs moving fluidly and not at all how they would react if he were still dying in a creaking shack. Nevertheless, all of this fascinated him. How the Dark Lord hadn't hopped out from behind the vaporous mist and cursed him to oblivion still stumped him, but this had to be some form of magic. He wasn't an idiot.

And yet, the rational side of his mind was twisting, attempting to figure out how this was possible. He didn't feel a trace of magic in the air, but yet a wand had been produced right before his eyes. He gazed down at his pocket, frowning.

Could magic even work here?

He took a deep breath and withdrew the instrument, uttering, "_Expecto Patronum_!"

The usual wisp of silvery vapor emerged, but something was terribly wrong. The silvery stream didn't flow into a silvery doe, but instead changed into brown, the color so vivid that he had to blink several times, believing something may have gone wrong within his head, or perhaps his eyesight.

He stepped back a few steps when a living doe emerged, its graceful head turning towards him expectantly. The chocolate brown eyes met his black, and Severus couldn't prevent his jaw from dropping faintly, amazed. The doe blinked, its great brown body turned towards the misty vapor, which seemed to melt upon its gaze.

Severus watched, his eyes transfixed, when he recognized the scarlet steam engine that appeared to his far left, a column of grey smoke rising into the still air. The doe lifted a slender leg, pawing impatiently at the ground and prancing on the spot, eyes lit with a fiery excitement.

The glimmer within its eyes seemed to wake Severus up, and he recognized the spark instantly. It was filled with boldness, with curiosity, with forgiveness, and most of all – with love.

"Lily," his voice was soft, and gentle, but it carried like a whisper. The doe stopped, and before Severus could so much as react, she turned on her heel and cantered down the suddenly emerging platform. "Lily!"

Unknowing to what was ahead, or even what could possibly be lurking behind the familiar Hogwarts Express, he sprinted after the doe. His robes flapped around him, his hair whipping past his face, but the thought of her emerald eyes and fiery hair made his heart pound, and his knees grow weak.

Had that been Lily?

He had to admit, getting his hopes up so high was bad news; he had done it way too many times in his past, believing again and again that Lily would always come back. But, she didn't in the end, because of _his_ mistake. He had hoped – beyond reason – that the Dark Lord might spare her. But, again, he was left both abandoned, and guilty.

Window after window passed by, his racing reflection illustrated back at him in a black blur. The doe seemed to clamber onto the train, with all of the doors opening simultaneously. The whistle sounded above, echoing across the never-ending platform, and though his breath was heaving and he was having an increasing stitch in his side, it didn't matter. He would pound on the doors and run across this platform endlessly if he could so much as catch a glimpse of the doe again; if he could have even a split second to see Lily again…

He climbed onto the staircase closest to him, the door snapping shut behind him. A final whistle sounded, and though his knees quaked and he panted as if he had run a marathon, he didn't stop. He was rushing aisle after aisle into the next few compartments, searching desperately.

The train lurched forward, but he didn't stop. Compartment after compartment passed by, but there were no signs of a doe, or even a presence upon the train. The momentum increased, and in the final one – in the last one – he stopped.

The doe stood frozen, her bright orbs shining in the faint light, her tail twitching faintly. His breathing had stopped, but he knew – somehow – that it was her. How could it not be?

Slowly he approached the animal, aware that her eyes were locked onto him, unwavering. He extended his hand, gently, and stopped.

It was a magical moment; within seconds the doe had closed the space, her nose softly touching his hand, and as if his touch were some magical spell, a silvery vapor once more appeared. He tried to look through the bright veil, tried to see what was happening, but it was much too bright.

Reluctantly, he shut his eyes, feeling a sharp gale blow through him, and through the compartment. He waited, and when his eyelids were no longer bright above his eyes, he hesitantly opened them.

He inhaled sharply; she was just as how he remembered her.

She was just twenty-one, he could tell easily enough, but her feminine charm was just as strong as he had remembered. Her hair was thick and red, and how he wished to touch the strands, even for a second. Her eyes gazed back at him calmly; almond shaped, and a startling green. He could never forget her beautiful eyes.

Her pale pink lips tugged into a loving smile, the smile he only guessed she had showered Harry Potter and James Potter with. It was so long ago, that he could hardly remember the times that her smile looked so stunning.

Severus had hardly a moment to react, though.

She had rushed forth, embracing him in a hug that made him collapse against the wall, his hand instantly stroking her vibrant red hair. Her body was curvaceous, and very solid, convincing him that he was indeed not dreaming. He couldn't breathe, feeling her holding him gently, a sensation that he had feared since the end of fifth year that he would never feel again.

Was death really this good?

"Lily," he whispered, and shut his eyes slowly, allowing himself a moment of vulnerability, his face pressing into her shoulder and his fingertips never leaving her hair. He had to be greedy, had to steal her away for just this fragment in time. It had been so long since he had laid eyes on her, let alone touched her. This was far better than he could've ever imagined, but surely this was not it? Surely this was not heaven?

"Sev," she whispered back, and all too soon she was pulling away, her height still too short to be able to look straight at him, but she was close. "You've been so brave."

It was in that moment that he had pulled his hand away, aware of the fact that he was still stroking Lily's hair. His hand felt empty, but his soul felt emptier. He longed to be the one in her arms, but more importantly, he longed to be the one who had not been the cause of her death.

"I am sorry," he uttered. "I am so, _so_ sorry."

Any last shred of his dignity was gone; he slid down the wall, his eyes filling with bitter tears that had not been released in years. The pain seemed to hit him twice as hard as it had when she had died. Here she was, a being that could interact with him, and remind him of the exact crime he had committed; of the innocence that he took away. Was this his punishment? To look into her calm, forgiving eyes, and see exactly what had been ripped away from him so unceremoniously?

His heart pounded ruthlessly, an organ truly straining to be released, and all the while, his chest was constricting and his throat felt dry. Breathing in deeply still wasn't enough; he was sure he could smell her perfume, even in this place of nothingness.

"Sorry, Sev?" she asked, and kneeled down, placing a comforting hand on his knee. She was so innocent; she shouldn't have died. Why did she have to die? But, he knew why. Because if she hadn't died, would Severus have retired to the good side? Would he be the man he was today?

No, he decided, and perhaps he wouldn't be in this beautiful place, gazing on into her loving eyes.

"I am the cause of your death," he whispered hoarsely. "I am the reason you are dead."

Her fingertips touched his cheek, and he shut his eyes blissfully, not caring that he was showing the emotional side of himself, because he owed her that much. He owed her that, and so much more.

"You do not have to be sorry," she admonished, though gently. "You helped Harry when he needed it most. You helped him defeat Lord Voldemort, and if it weren't for you…"

She couldn't finish, because now she was filled with the same sorrow he had also felt. She knew it had been hard for him; she had been watching from above, well aware of the struggles that Severus Snape had faced. Yes, Harry had the same physical appearance of his father, but his eyes – she knew Severus could look into them and see her gazing back at him. And from time-to-time, he did.

"You were forever devoted to me," she continued. "And because of that, Harry Potter lives – my _son_ lives."

He wished to kiss her, those soft lips that were now plump from her watery eyes. He wished to kiss away every tear, and hold her close, not wanting to ever let her go again. But, he didn't dare it, and he knew she would never let him behave so affectionately. Wherever they were now, she had forgiven him, and he knew it the second the living doe had emerged from the tip of his wand.

"Where are we?" he changed the subject strategically, the logical side taking over the gentle being within, a rouse that seemed to work perfectly.

"Limbo," she replied, smiling.

"Limbo?" he repeated, and slowly stood up, his eyes gazing distantly out the window. There really was nothing to see; the same white mist was clinging to the windows. "There's no Heaven? No Hell? No… nothing?"

"Oh, there is a Heaven and Hell," she answered. "You just have to be led in the right direction."

"So, where am I going?" he was fearful. He was never one to admit to believing in Muggle religions, but after seeing what he had seen… he didn't exactly deny it so much anymore. "It's Hell, isn't it…" he didn't ask, but his voice was filled with dread.

"Why would you iever/i think such a thing?" she demanded, her expression incredulous. "You made bad decisions – yes, but Sev, you have been braver than any soul I have ever known. What was now tarnished, is now pure."

She lifted his left arm boldly, and though he instinctively wanted to shrink away, he had eventually remembered that the branded mark had been somehow removed. The pale, glowing skin was all that remained.

"This is a place of innocence," she continued. "A soul is cleansed here. There is no sign that Dark Magic has ever marked you. You are free here."

"So, that's why…" he trailed off, the burden of the Dark Lord, of the Death Eaters, of Dumbledore's tedious tasks, and of Harry Potter's safety now slowly being released from the coldness of his heart. "I'm free?"

"Yes, you are free," she repeated, now grinning. "Thanks to you, Voldemort has been destroyed. Thanks to you, everything is the way it had been before he came to power."

Relief struck him, like a chord straight to his heart. He had never felt so light-hearted, never felt so happy and yet sad at the same time. True, his life had ended – quite tragically – and it was hard to say if Harry Potter would ever have the guts or standards to clear his name, but none of that mattered.

He was a free man.

"What happens now?" he asked, relishing the sudden feeling of release and freedom. "Where is Heaven? How do I get there? Or will I be a _ghost_?"

Lily actually laughed at his last comment, registering the sardonic tone of his voice.

"You are Heaven bound, Severus," she replied, softly. "There is no way that you would ever become a ghost. You are done on Earth, and now, you are being set free. You will move on to the afterlife, and there you can be and do what you wish, though of course, there _are_ certain guidelines. Fred Weasley himself has tried to bypass some of them; he really can be a troublemaker."

"But… the afterlife? How does that work? How can I just _go_?"

"I take you, silly!" she beamed. "Albus and I both figured you'd prefer me over him… I suppose there's a bit you still want to settle with him…"

"You could say that," he muttered, but his curiosity made him realize that it all could wait. "How does it work?"

"Whatever form you wish to take in the afterlife will come true," she whispered.

"I don't understand," he shook his head, perplexed.

"When we were young," she began, smiling distantly. "You were carefree, innocent, and nothing mattered."

"I can be that again?" he asked, feeling suddenly grateful. "Will you be there?"

"I will take you there," she confessed, smiling.

"But, what about James? What about –?"

"There is enough of me to go around," she grinned. "As souls, we can detach. A part of me will live with James – and Harry when he passes on – but I can also be with you."

"I want to go back," he confessed, unable to hide his smile. "I want to go back. Back to when no mistakes were made. When we were young, and Hogwarts hadn't started. When we made fun of Petunia. But, my parents –"

"Do not have to be there," she declared. "This is iyour/i heaven, Severus. If you want me to be there, it can be done. We can be kids again, if you wish."

His eyes were lit with fire and joy. He could live back to when his mistakes had never existed. He could live in a place where pain did not exist. He could live with Lily, living those carefree days for all eternity.

"But, everything else that's happened –?" he cut himself off, hesitant now.

"If you choose to remember everything that's happened, that can happen, too. If you want to know exactly how you got here, and the sacrifices made, you can know this. It will forever be locked in your memory."

Suddenly, she outstretched her hand.

He was hesitant, staring at her soft skin, untarnished by evil deeds. Her fingertips were peach, and an innocent smile tugged affectionately at her lips. She was irresistible in that moment, and as his eyes locked onto hers, he couldn't deny her inviting gesture. He took her hand quickly, and felt the same familiar gust of wind, and the same comfort and warmth that his wand had given him.

Within seconds he could feel himself shrinking. His hair was long and stringy, his nose the same hooked shape but a little smaller, and his clothes somehow decreasing in size with him. He was once more an innocent boy. He could already picture himself walking out of his house at Spinner's End, ready to meet Lily with a greedy but playful smile on his face.

Looking across from him, Lily was shorter, too. In fact, she was almost his height, with long red hair, and the same green eyes. Her smile had turned to a grin, and though only the age of nine or ten, her radiance was still the same as she had looked as an adult.

The train lurched to a stop, and Severus hesitated.

"Where are we?" he asked, timidly. His voice was the same as it had been when he was a child, but he always remembered being bolder, and smarter. Currently, his tone sounded more like a frightened Hufflepuff. However, Lily would never judge.

Ever.

"Where do you want to be?"

He thought desperately, and she squeezed his hand as a comforting gesture. Her innocent voice left him feeling calmer, and his desperation had slowed.

"I… don't know," he admitted, frowning.

"Why don't we go see?" she suggested. A fiery glint in her eye hinted at her more playful side, and she seemed excited at the suggestion of an adventure. He smiled, a true smile that hadn't reached his eyes in years.

He couldn't speak in that moment, but nodded vigorously, feeling her persuading hand hauling him out of the train's doors and out into the adventures awaiting him.

With her by his side, he was already in Heaven.


End file.
